No , notBillGates . Who wish about that frumpish sweater - wear thin placard tyke for an anti - slouching campaign ? No , the Macalope ’s talking about Apple -gates . You cognise , the Apple scandals everyone loves to talk about . The smash summer hit ANTENNAGATE ( the AP Style Guide assert that all -gates be capitalized to maximise the scandalous implications ) was followed by the lusterless sequelGLASSGATE , but do n’t concern ! There ’s still a good deal of life in this franchise !
IPAD ROTATION CONTROLGATE
In the realm of usability nerdery , the Mac wonk has no peer .
It ’s a feedback iteration . the great unwashed who wish thing to be well - design are attracted to Apple products , which then reinforce the ethic . The Macalope has long considered starting a grade activeness suit against Apple for ruining his enjoyment of anyone else ’s products .
Maybe that ’s why Steve Jobs has indicated the company think to make a rare mistaken design change and commute the functionality of the side switch on the iPad from an orientation lock to mute . Lex Friedman ’s already lay out why this is a bad melodic theme and his horizon was ring across the Apple Web humanity .
It ’s not the first sentence Apple ’s done something bass- , trout- or some - other - river - fish - ackwards . We all remember TRANSLUCENT MENU BARGATE do n’t we ? ( “ IT WAS HELL , ” recall A SURVIVOR ) . And all it take was a monolithic amount of caterwaul ( some of it require actual bozo ) to get Apple to make it a configurable scene . Then again , hoi polloi complained about Command - N exchange from making a raw brochure in OS 9 to progress to a young Finder window in OS X and expect where that baffle them . Most of those masses are utter now .
Apple has been known to mind to substance abuser outcry from time to time , though . Much like the apocryphal workers of old , perhaps we need to thrust our iPads into the machinery in protest .
Figuratively mouth of class .
[ whispers to iPad]The Macalope would never hurt you . Shhh .
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Other Apple -gates in the news
If usability is n’t your thing , well , first of all what are you doinghere ? But second , perhaps one of the many other Apple -gates will pique your sake . There are so many to choose from !
There’sWHITE IPHONE GATE , FALLING MARGINGATE , hole-and-corner DEVELOPER SUMMITGATE , IPHONE SCREEN LOCKGATEand so many more ! Collect them all and trade them with your friends !
( OK , the last one is in reality awkward . )
Coulda, shoulda, woulda
What aboutCASH ON HANDGATE ?
Why Apple Should Buy Facebook , Twitter , Yahoo
If you ’re thinking the only rational solution is “ because justburningthat amount of money would look frivolous ” then you ’ve got more horse sensation than eWeek ’s Clint Boulton . And the cavalry he rode in on .
In typical eWeek style , however , the ribbing is more obscene than the article . While the e - postal service blast title reads as above , theactual clause title is :
Apple Could corrupt Facebook , Twitter , Zynga , Others with Its $ 51B
square . BAIT AND SWITCH . ONE STAR .
Boulton sagely notes Yahoo “ may be a stretch . ” No , Clint , the Macalope being able to scrape $ 1,400 together to corrupt a tricked out MacBook Air “ may be a stretching . ” Apple buying Yahoo is more the worst sort of engineering industry fantasy porn conceivable . Like a stack of porn , it ’s easygoing to see how one partner would enjoy it ( Yahoo , Digg , ARM ) but hard to see how the other one would ( Apple ) .
Boulton ’s other suggestions make you wonder if this trip was really necessary .
Imagine the marriage of EA ’s games with the iPhone and the iPad .
Ooh , yeah ! Why , it ’d probably see … something like this . If only we could imagine something like that !
In fairness to Boulton and the other speculators out there , Steve Jobsgot this ball undulate in the former quarterly conference callby implying Apple want to save its cash for possible “ strategical chance . ” The Macalope really wishes he had n’t , though . Idle speculation is the devil ’s shop .
